There is too much great music to listen to; too many good books to read; too many excellent wines to try; too many interesting places to visit; too many brilliant foods too eat; too many interesting people to talk to; too many places to hike.
The older I get, the more I realize that the constraint is time.
When i first got my PhD, I was sure that I could keep up with the broad field. After all, I was well-trained in the basics and could read and figure out anything. I still believe that, but I now realize that I just don’t have the time nor the energy. I can feel the depreciation of my intellectual capital, day by day, minute by minute, class by class.
I could fix it, but I don’t have the time. I often spend days running around like a chicken with its head cut off because of the stress–yet I not able to find the time to sit still and concentrate.
I suppose that I am more efficient at writing papers, but surely I am less efficient at sitting and thinking about what to do. And having ideas, making intellectual connections and so on. There is always another report to write, another class to prepare, another meeting to attend, another student to meet. Nor can I stay at work for hours and come in all weekend–I have a home life (yay!).
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